Do You See Me?

7 Jan

Written by Lucy Honeysett

Last year, I had the privilege of meeting a remarkable woman called Julie. She had a progressive neurological condition and when I met her, she was living in a nursing home, dependant on carers for everything. She remained in bed most of the time, unable to verbally communicate, but when her painful spasms settled, she could use one finger to spell out words using an alphabet board. This took time and patience for Julie and all involved. Time was something the carers didn’t always have so there was an increasing fear for Julie that she was being lost, not heard, not seen, or understood.

To help her process her illness and communicate her inner thoughts, she wrote poetry. In fact, she wrote enough to publish and sell a book of poems with the proceeds going to charity.

I met her weeks before she died and when we spent time together, we agreed I’d do all I can to help share that though she appeared very different to the old Julie who would ride a horse, paint and write, she was still there, if we took the time to see. It only takes seconds to make a meaningful connection: to show we care by ensuring the tone of our voice isn’t belittling or patronising, to ensure our touch is tender and respectful, to do all we can to meet needs in prompt ways, and be honest if time is pressed for longer conversation but commit to returning when there’s another opportunity. We can communicate empathy and compassion with our eyes as we connect with someone who is longing to be seen, choose to see each person as a fellow image bearer who is of great worth, to lean in to God who gives us the help we need to care when we may be feeling overwhelmed, saddened by what we see, impatient or weary.

With the Holy Spirit at work in us, we can show the fruits of the Spirit which communicates God’s heart (Gal 5:22-23). He equips us with all we need to do to good works He’s prepared for us (Heb 13:21). He is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). He protects the vulnerable and asks us to speak up for them (Prov 31:8), and places the lonely into families or care homes (Psalm 68:6). He gives us strength when we feel so tired and weary (Isa 40:29-23). May God bless you as you serve Him this way – He rejoices over you with singing and renews you with His love (Zeph 3:17).